February’s Special Guest – Melody Ross

When we came up with a list of people to ask if they would be willing to guest post on our blog, Melody Ross was at the top of our list. I think this month’s theme is a perfect fit for Melody because she has a way with words and each time I read them, they speak right to my soul. I am always moved to tears. It’s an honor and privilege to have the beautiful and talented Melody Ross here. If you’ve never seen it, you should make sure to check out her blog. Thank you so much being here with us, Melody.

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Soul n. the immaterial part of a person; the actuating cause of an individual life

I am really am so thankful that the subject for this month was SOUL, and that I had the opportunity to really contemplate the enormous meaning of such a very small word. Writing about soul and gratitude simultaneously has shown me just how much they want to hold hands with each other throughout life, and how much more joyful our lives would be if we would just remember that. I believe that the soul by its very nature lives a life of constant gratitude, simply for the joy of it…our souls see the beauty in the sunrise, the potential of every child and adult, and the small miracles that fill every day.

This year, someone sent me a simple snapshot that has ended up being my favorite photo of myself, ever. It is nothing spectacular to the naked eye, but in it lies a victory that is so compelling and hard-won and comes across powerfully to me in this photo. This photo was taken on a day that I knew for sure that my SOUL had come back to stay….I can even see it in my eyes.

My gratitude runs deep and wide that our souls are so persistent in working to get our attention when we are veering away from the truth and wisdom that they hold for us as individuals. How is it that we can hear our soul…..like it is a separate being who we have partnered with, rather than a part of us? I have learned that it can be either a part of us, a separate part…trying so hard to chase us down, get us to listen, and get us back on track….and that when we let our conscious self fall away from our soul, rather than join with it…….our lives can become fragmented, confusing, joyless….soul-less, empty.

I have been there, and my gratitude lies deeply in a place where I found my soul again, invited her to be a part of my life, listened to her, helped her to heal….and promised her that I would never let the two of us become separated again.

I believe that our souls are our hearts and our brains are the rest of us. Our souls are open and creative and trusting and full of light. Our brains are rational and will only base things on experiences and proof. I believe our hearts should be in charge of our brains, because our hearts will be fair. I believe our brains will become control freaks and not even listen to our hearts if they are left to be in charge. Our bodies will try to overpower our souls……..when really, they should be working in union. I think our souls should always be in charge.

My soul went somewhere for a while…..I don’t know when it happened or how it happened, but I do know that much of it had to do with the assumption that I should listen closely to what others had to say about how I should be living my life…..what my goals should be…how I should spend my time and who I should spend it with……somewhere in there, I started to do that……and slowly…..slowy…slowly………..my soul started to starve.

She tried at first to get me to listen. I was too busy doing and being and having and fighting to keep my place in the world and thinking….those kinds of activities are loud and drown out the quiet little soul voice that still just never gives up.

I spent years this way…….and from the outside, I am certain that it looked like I was all put together……when….really, I felt confused, misguided, broken, lost and empty. I felt like my arms were barely connected to me, like my head was barely screwed on and that my legs hung by a string….I felt like my heart was completely outside of my body…and even though I had known the experience of soaring in my own authentic way, at this point, my wings were a broken arms-length away. I felt fragmented and disconnected and used-up…..

I made this sculpture during that time in my life. I will never forget the experience of it……I was in the scariest funk of my life….and had lost my words. I could not write, I could not paint, I could not carry on a conversation……..I started to pick up clay…..and one day, this little sculpture was born. It was a message from my SOUL. She had a lot to say………she wanted me to know that my wings were still there should I make the choice to fly again. She wanted me to know that my arms and my legs and my head were all still there………but that we had to work together to heal things all up to make them whole…….she told me that she wanted me to listen….to trust her. She told me she knew the way…that SHE knew who I was, what I was capable of, what I needed…what SHE needed. She told me that I could have the most joyful life imaginable if I would just take her hand and listen…..and STOP listening to what everyone else had to say.

She reminded me that life was good and that I was ok, but that we had some work to do. She told me that we had to love each other…..and that we both needed to build trust in each other again so that we could rely on each other. She told me that I was dying inside, and she was dying inside, and we were each other’s only life support.

She told me what to do.

She told me how to do it.

She lifted me up when those decisions brought difficult stages on their way to powerful changes.

She is my new best friend.

We are together again…me and my soul…..my brain and my heart. My brain has finally given up on being in charge, because my soul has proven to know the best ways to go, and always uses my brain when needed………..

And the result has been the best art, the happiest life, the most fulfilling relationships and the quietest, yet most ennobling peace of heart and mind that my life has ever seen.

Yes, I am grateful for SOUL. And my soul is grateful for everything……that’s why I listen to her when she has something to say.