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Ah, the Gym

May 6, 2010

My undergraduate degree is in Psychology and all that really means is that I know a little bit about various subjects within that subject. One of my favorite teachers had written a book on anxiety disorders and how to cure them through exercise. I had just discovered I had anxiety before I took his class, so it was very relevant to me.

You see, I was in the movie theatre with a boyfriend watching Pulp Fiction. About half way through, I suddenly felt that terrible feeling before getting sick. I jumped out of my seat and ran out of the theatre. As soon as I was through the doors, I started feeling better. I was no longer hot. I could breath easier. So, instead of heading for the restrooms, I went out to the car and stood there. Then, I started crying and couldn’t stop. I had never felt fear like that. Not ever. I had no idea what was happening. I couldn’t stop crying. I couldn’t stop trembling. It wasn’t just the feeling of being ill, it was intense fear rolled up with it. I decided the movie must have really affected me. That I was no longer into slasher/graphic type movies like I used to be. But, then the following week, we went to see another movie and the same feeling came over me and I had to leave.

I later discovered I was having anxiety attacks. I went on the medication I was prescribed and it made me feel absolutely nothing, so I stopped. I’ll take the anxiety, if I can have joy back, thank you very much. Fast forward to my college course and a solution to my problem; exercise. I started working out after taking the class. The truth was that I hated to exercise and never did it. But, if I could get rid of my anxiety, I would do it. It greatly helped. It did. In fact, it helped so well, that I stopped exercising a few years later.

Recently, however, my anxiety has started to drip back into my life. Just a bit here and there, but it’s starting to get stronger. I need to get back to a good routine of regular exercise. I feel great when I do it, but I hate taking the time to do it. It’s time for me to get over myself and do what is best for me. So, I was grateful for the reminder when I saw Scrapdreams “Gym” entry in our flickr site. There is Zumba in my near future, for sure.

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