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Faking It

July 20, 2010

Yesterday, I woke up in a terrible mood. I was feeling both angry and sad, and of course, very soon, frustration joined in, too. Before it was 9am, I had already disappointed myself and been impatient with my kids. And, honestly, I could tell that I wasn’t nearly done. I was in such a bad mood that I could see it continuing for days and affecting others around me and creating this ripple of bad moods.

Wonderful, eh?

For some reason, around 11am, I decided enough was enough and that I wasn’t going to spend the day brooding and feeling sorry for my frustrated self. I decided to take the “fake it till you make it” approach. I figured I can act the way I want to feel. I decided I would mentally take the day off and have some ice cream with my kids, play in the yard, maybe even go for a walk and just fake being happy until I actually felt it.

So I grabbed a popsicle and told my older son that the three of us were going to share it. The joy in his face already did wonders for my mood. Within an hour or so, I was feeling considerably better. So much so that I sat and accomplished a lot of work. Then I went to the yard to play with my kids and we laughed and laughed as we played.

By night time, there were still some feelings of unease but they were receding quickly and I felt very strongly that tomorrow (today) was going to be a better day. This morning, I woke up feeling much better and more positive. It’s still not 100% better but I am still “faking it till I make it” and there’s a lot less faking than yesterday.

Sometimes that’s what a gratitude journal is about, too. There are days when it feels like there’s nothing good in my life. Days when I am so upset by something that it colors everything else I feel. But my journal forces me to come up with three things, even on that day. It feels fake and I just go through the motions. But, often, by the time my list is complete, I feel slightly better. I have to admit that even on that terrible day, there are good things in my life.

And sometimes the faking really really works.

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One Comment leave one →
  1. August 6, 2010 6:32 am

    I fake it all the time…though don’t tell anyone :)

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